A rainbow baby is a baby born after a pregnancy loss or stillbirth. There is something extra special about rainbow baby stories because they tell the story of the joy after the pain, the hope after a loss, the renewal after the defeat. Thank you, Krysta, for sharing your beautiful rainbow birth story with us!
Jaxon’s Rainbow Birth Story
By: Krysta Lee
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Bringing new life into the world is the greatest blessing bestowed upon women. Whether a woman births her babies naturally at home, or via cesarean section with the help of a team in a hospital, her story is important, special, and unique.
I’ve heard birth stories from mamas who loved it, those who hated it, and some who even prefer to be knocked out and woken up when babe arrived – and it’s all valid! Each individual mama does what’s best for her and her baby – that’s true love, and it’s part of the great power we’ve been gifted as mama bears.
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“This is the story of my first birthing experience: that of our rainbow baby boy Jaxon.”
I was one of the lucky ones . . . my pregnancy was amazing, and I absolutely loved being with child! I understand not all women do, so I sympathize for the mamas who didn’t enjoy it as much, or had severe complications. I must note however, I had my fair share of challenges prior to that, due to my own previous health issues.
I was born with spina bifida, and developed scoliosis in my teens. Multiple corrective surgeries later, and I’m left with three titanium rods permanently fused to my spine. Several doctors along the way told me I would have serious complications, and that even if I was able to conceive down the road, I’d more than likely be bed ridden, wouldn’t make it to full term, and would require a c-section under full sedation because I wouldn’t be able to birth naturally nor be a candidate for an epidural. Yikes!
I also struggled with fertility, as my husband and I had been trying to conceive for nearly half a decade up until that pregnancy. We had two miscarriages during that time, as well as a pre-cancerous scare that required laser surgery on my cervix.
That being said, you can imagine how thrilled we were when our little “third time’s the charm” finally happened! We chose not to find out the gender of our baby, and lived in a place of gratitude for those nine months until the big day came.
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“I dreamt of birthing naturally at home, and watched dozens of home-birthing videos in preparation of what to expect.”
Since epidurals are out of the question for me, I had one of two choices to make: a vaginal birth without pain intervention (working against the odds the doctors predicted would be my fate), or, a c-section where I would be fully sedated, miss the birth, and possibly risk harming baby and myself in the process.
Being the determined, persistent, and against-the-odds type of person I am (and after discussing everything with our amazing team of midwives of course!), I chose to have my baby au natural. This led me to wanting the comforts that I could only get at home.
Unfortunately, it was a decision that my concerned family and friends were not all on board with, however, I had to choose what felt best to me. My husband and I went over all the necessary precautions, pros, and cons with our midwives, and we came up with a plan that best suited my personal birthing goals.
I wanted to have a water birth, as I’m naturally drawn to the healing benefits of said element. I also wanted to have several things surrounding me at the time, like: meditation music; candles; essential oils; diffusers; crystals; sage; inspirational pictures; birthing affirmations on the walls; the positive energy at home; peace and quiet with no one there but us (and midwives); and most importantly: a comforting, zen, dimly-lit space in which our baby would enter the world.
We set everything up weeks in advance, and made it a priority to have everything on hand and ready to go for whenever babe debuted – so much fun! All of the planning, preparation, and persistence paid off, as it set us up for one of the most incredible experiences of our lives.
Are you curious about what home birth looks like? Check out these resources:
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“On Valentine’s Day 2017, my husband and I went to our midwife appointment in the 38th week of my pregnancy. Little did we know I’d give birth to our little son-shine just hours later.”
Upon walking into the clinic late that morning, I felt a little trickle – as though I had leaked a little. I remember thinking: oh my gosh, is this it?! No gush like in the movies?! My midwife checked me over, and confirmed it was indeed amniotic fluid. Baby was on its way!
We went home and were instructed to call our midwife according to the “5-1-1” rule. The contractions came on stronger and more frequently, and by 4pm, our midwife arrived to see how we were doing. My water was still leaking slowly, so we had another decision to make: she could break my water fully, or, we could wait it out . . . However, if more than 24hrs went by from the time of the initial leak, we would have to go to the hospital and re-evaluate the situation from there, in order to prevent risk of infection.
I chose to have my water broken right then and there, and it worked! Within minutes my contractions intensified, and we were officially in full-on pre-labour stage! I remember being quite scared, as I had never experienced anything like it, and was unsure of when to “push”. I felt drawn to being grounded and wanted to lay on the floor, so my husband made a giant nest of blankets and pillows all around me. It was dreamy!
When active labour began around 8pm, my body naturally began to push on its own, and it was time to get into the birthing tub. We rented one from a local supplier, and filled it with beautifully warm water. It was incredibly soothing, to the point where my contractions actually slowed down, and the intensity dissipated. I was so relaxed floating around, however our midwives said we needed to make sure we kept things moving safely forward, so onward we went.
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“I realized that if I didn’t focus on birthing, and allowed the comforts to distract me too much, the labour sensations kind of ‘went away’. Who knew?!”
I began to focus on my baby moving downward, just like in the diagrams I researched. I envisioned the birthing of babe through a magical funneling vortex – down and out – observing every sensation along the way. The more I focused on what I was experiencing, the more I experienced it, incredible!
I called upon my higher self, my spirit guides, my deceased loved ones (including my pets passed!), and had an entire team surrounding me – physically and spiritually. It is a vision I will remember forever.
My husband was so supportive, and was there every step of the way. He made me feel like a queen. Our midwives were absolutely stellar too, and they helped guide me and made me feel safe and secure. They all stayed with me throughout the entire process, regularly checking baby’s and my heart rate, which remained normal without fluctuation the entire time.
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“I allowed my body to do its thing, as it naturally knew to do, and I leaned into the spaces that felt right for me.”
I took breaks when I needed to, and felt best bent forward on my knees, holding my hubby’s hands. As our baby’s head crowned, and I felt the “burning ring of fire” (which my BFF Steph told me about!), I knew then I’d be holding my baby in mere minutes.
A moment later, at 8:59pm our babe was officially born. What. A. Miracle! Our rainbow baby had finally arrived, and was actually in my arms for a several moments before we even thought to check what we had . . . It was a BOY!! And boy, was he the biggest surprise of our lives!
He was happy, healthy, and whole – the most perfect gift we could ever ask for. He was so chill, our midwives were mildly concerned when he didn’t come out screeching as most babies do. After unwrapping him from his umbilical cord, cutting it, then whisking him away to get those airways opened, his vocals rang out and it was the best sound I ever heard.
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“Jaxon made it into the world, delivered at home without complications or interventions, just like we had hoped and prayed for. I thank my lucky stars to this day, and am eternally grateful for that.”
Our Valentine’s day baby came complete with a heart-shaped placenta, which our midwives said they had never seen before. We knew right then our little boy was here to spread love, and that’s exactly what he’s been doing every day since.
Giving birth to him gave me a gift that’s even greater still: the opportunity to rise up and step into my power amidst the challenges. It allowed me to find my true calling: which is to overcome adversity, and, make miracles happen. It rounded and shaped me as a woman, and I am eternally grateful for the greatest gift I can give: birth.
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If I were to leave here one bit of advice or pearl of wisdom, it would simply be this:
“Listen to your intuition, dear mama.”
Only you know your body best, so pay attention to whatever cues she’s giving you. Women are capable of more than meets the eye, and motherly instincts are more powerful than man can conceive. A positive mindset, faith, and belief are key in everything we do.
Allow the natural instincts of mother nature to guide you, and go forth gently with the ebb and flow.
“In love and light, may birth blessings be yours.” xox
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Krysta Lee Short Biography:
Krysta Lee is a singer and songwriter, actor, author, artist, coach, and health and wellness marketing executive who is the proud mama of two beautiful babes (Jaxon and Lillee), and wife to her twin flame, DJ. Her family (and faminals!) live a modern-day-hippie lifestyle in Prince Edward County, Ontario, Canada. She’s an optimist, a goal-getter, and a big-dreamer who’s had a passion for all things writing-related since her early childhood days. Empowering others is important to her because she believes that as women, we have an obligation to make a positive impact on the world. She understands that our future is a direct result of the actions we take today, and hopes to inspire as many people as possible with her life’s work.
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""I confided in Suzzie that I struggle with anxiety and a lot of self doubt. To be honest, I just wasn't sure I was cut out to do birth. After a conversation with her, I realized that the process of overcoming these doubts and fears was going to be an amazing gift. She gave me confidence to start working towards the birth I wanted. I went into birth feeling safe and ready. And I had a great experience. I'm glad I had the courage to start. That was the hardest part." - Olivia-Grace , a mom who took the first step and kept on going